my handwriting sucks

Handwritten notebooks with some doodles. Mostly cursive

I have a fountain pen driver's license ("Füllerführerschein"). I got it in primary school, but only passed on my second attempt. My teachers hated my handwriting. I don't really like it, either.

I really want to look into the Palmer Method, because I don't write with my shoulders, but with my hands, which is not ideal.

I mostly write cursive. My boyfriend has a hard time reading my cursive, he did not learn it at school (in Denmark). He was born in 1999. I was born in 1997, and still learned cursive at primary school (in Germany).

I like LAMY fountain pens. I used many plastic LAMY safari over the years. One of my favourite models was the transparent one. They are cheap!

Since 2019 or so, I've been using a silver colored LAMY aion with a fine nib. Its body is made from anodized aluminium. It was also affordable.

I like writing in plain A5 Clairfontaine notebooks with 90 g/m² paper.

Lines feel a bit limiting. I prefer an empty, white page, on which I can doodle and write freely. It is fun to write non-linearly.

A5 is the ideal page size to me, A4 feels too big.

Mostly, I use single-use ink cartridges, but I also have a refillable cartridge.

I prefer writing with black ink, but blue ink is also alright, even though it reminds me a bit of school.

When I use pencils, I prefer very soft ones, like 4B.

Doodle of an animal and a tree. Some handwritten text.

Doodle of some lines; some look like a face. Some handwritten text.

It is fun looking through old notebooks.

Doodle of a shadow. Some text. A strange line drawing.

Doodle of a devilish entity entering a door.

It is like reading a stranger's thoughts, because I don't remember what I wrote.

Doodle of an old stick figure in a gravehard; cursive text.

My diary entries tend to be somewhere between fiction and fact. Sometimes, I just write down words I have learned. I like to repeat sentences which sound nice. Chewing words, and spitting them out again.

I write, but often I don't read what I have written.

Doodle of a book with the title 'How to be concise - Vol. 1'; the book is comically big.

Which means I forget. It can be freeing to forget. Sometimes it feels like the world just forgot about me. I certainly have forgotten the world sometimes. I am lost to the world, ich bin der Welt abhanden gekommen.

Pencil doodle of modular tree-house like structures

Doodle of surprised stick figures and a f-111 nighthawk like geometry

I try to have compassion with my past self, even if what I wrote does not make sense anymore, or is embarrassing. It can be wonderful to change, to grow, and to transition.

Every day, piecemeal evolution. Soon I will be pure wonder. (Annelyse Gelman)

If I'm being honest, it feels like I have been mostly rotting, though. But to rot is to live, living is rotting.

Orange sticky note with text: 'som ingen savner du vinger / dine fødder har jorden brændt.'

Doodle of line-person sitting alone in their line room.

I like the idea of writing and doodling as an act of self-compassion. ∎