~ tilde notebooks ~

compiled by ~joe

🏳️‍🌈 proudly queering the tildespace since 2014 🏳️‍⚧️

a note on covid-19

It goes w/o saying that we are in the midst of the worst pandemic in over a century. No one could have seen such a terrible catastrophe coming; and doubtless none of us will ever forget it for the rest of our lives.

I took the opportunity to really work on my personal fitness and mental health in the year since this terrible pandemic came to light. I lost two friends to this terrible disease and went through many sleepless nights. I had to completely overhaul my entire life, including my sleep and work habits, to accomodate the presence of this disease. I am lucky to have never gotten it.


please forgive the shitty quality of this website as i was on whippits and cbd gummies when i put this page together

not everyone has the time/energy/desire toa learn how to code in css but i tried!!! fuck

okay so it's been a few years

i've had the chance to learn how to code in css with some success (see my main webpage if you rly like gifs)

i've always been a big believer in DIY aesthetics & design. i've been on tilde.town since 2014 (so long ago!). You can see the original tilde notebooks here.

i don't have a lot of time for making/doing things as much anymore (i work all the time in the tech industry and am on fairly high demand). i love the internet and the weird things/people on it. the internet has given me more satisfaction than most things in life and i don't plan to be leaving it any time soon.

in the last few years i've had the opportunity to revisit a lot of the reasons why i've been on the internet and i've come to the conclusion that:
  • i'm fairly lonely
  • i have a shit understanding of personal boundaries, so the internet allows me to expand/violate those boundaries
  • i have shit self-esteem due to toxic masculinity & body dysmorphia

this has not been an easy journey for me as i've had to unmake a lot of bad decisions and life choices recently. i'm in therapy and in recovery for a lot of things right now. what matters though, is if i am accountable to people on this website and to myself for the ways that i've hurt people because of my refusal to accept who i am


and now for a short video break

did you hear that the cock destroyers broke up

mid-may update

i guess there's not much to report. i'm on instagram a lot more these days and when i'm not on instagram i'm usually working out!

fitness wise i've been losing about 5-6 lbs every week, which puts me about 100+ lbs lost within the last six months or so. i follow a pretty strict diet which doesn't allow very much (like I can't really even eat rice, or pasta or bread, not even tortillas). people ask me which is the best kind of workout and honestly it depends on the body, but a combination of HIIT workouts and long walks work for me. I average about 40 minutes of exercise every day. exercise is the only thing that keeps me sane (i hate my job and therefore walking is the only thing that mitigates a lot of the negative mental health impact of it).

i don't like my job very much (full disclosure: i work in admin) and i although I work with some nice people, i really don't like the industry i am working in. i enjoyed the tech industry a lot because of the wonderful people i got to meet from all over the world. within the span of a year i met people from india, china, japan, macau, thailand, india, singapore, poland, france, germany, and croatia. they were all wonderfully bright and intelligent, and each had their own take on the global technology community.

aside from that, that's pretty much about it. i try to keep abreast of all things tilde but in the last few years my job and my fitness journey have taken up a lot of my time. i still say hello to ~vilmibm and ~jumblesale and often pop in to say hello to ~caff. most of my time is found on our mastodon instance, where you can find folx like ~selfsame.

i plan to write more in june, when i'll actually have the time to write about some of the more interesting experiences i've had during the pandemic...

~joe

p.s. in the meantime, enjoy some sad, sweet mexican and portuguese music I compiled on apple music!