i'm having a panic attack, after realizing i've been in a dissociative state for at least three months continuously.
i fell down from my bed, hit my head on the bedside table and then the floor. i started coughing from panic and from the dust on the floor that had accumulated over the past week.
i wanted to ask for help, but i am alone. nobody will come to save me.
over the course of three minutes that felt like hours that felt like days, i considered suicide. i considered going to a psych ward. i considered getting up and pretending that none of this ever happened.
i started writing poems. but my phone is still on the bed. the whole world is just me, the floor, and my poems i write to myself