Excerpt 1 from the Markov files.
I made Tilde things for you
Slip away across the Tildeverse.
Excerpt 2 from the Markov files.
I made IRC things for you
Poem Cut-Up — Wilfred Owen.
A brief riddle.
Sonnet the Hedgehog.
I made games for you
This Is Sweet To Say.
A stream of unconsciousness.
Excerpt 3 from the Markov files.
Sonnet the Chrono Trigger.
The snowball that started an avalanche.
I made Twitterbots for you.
The Love Song of J. Alfred Emo-Rock.
Rhyming Poem Cut-Up — Walt Whitman.
Excerpts from The Book of Antiverbs.
I made good things for you.
nossidge's lol-out-loud comedy corner.
Sonnet the Final Fantasy VII.
Excerpt 4 from the Markov files.
I made bad things for you.
Poem Cut-Up — Ted Hughes.
There are more like us.


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Excerpt 1 from the Markov files.



YOU ARE:
"unfortunate"
YOU MUST BECOME


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I made Tilde things for you.



tildeverse This is a list of all the users in the Tildeverse. It used to be cron'd, but the December server reset broke it. I'll fix it up at some point, don't worry. quiz Take a quiz to see which Tilde Town ~user you are! Words are compiled by scraping the public_html of all Tildees. The aspect of this that took the most time was the colour scheme. As you can see, I nailed it. tilde The idea for this is a sort of tilde tane. A collection of tilde themed JavaScript sketches that lead to the next.


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Slip away across the Tildeverse.



TILDEVERSE

Usersby~nossidge
Boxesby~pfhawkins
Searchby~qqwy
Originsby~ford


TILDETOWN INFORMATION

~nossidge~/.profile
~shanxLearnings
~agsUpdates to index.html
~sigvesebUpdates to all ~/public_html
~sharpSize of ~/public_html per user
~nickUsers currently online
~jumblesaleQuotebot instructions
~frsAdd quotes to Quotebot
~kcActivity


TILDETOWN ARTISTRY

~selfsame*Desktop
~robbymealsoooooh
~cmrTilde Town
~karlen*'No one will ever read this but'
~rainMaze 1
~forkingpathsMaze 2
~tom*Zork
~ironfroggyTriangles 1
~billputerTriangles 2
~emiltayl*Haikumon of the day
~magicalSpinny tilde
~dymaxionSpinny cow
~sanqui*Pokémon ROM randomiser
~anticCards and cubes
~owenversteegASCII art shrimp
~quephird*Robotron: 2015
~objelisksDot Town
~nclmOne minute songs from DVA
~subtransience*Machine-generated texts
~benJust a gif. But a nice gif
~yoavYOOOOOUUUUUUU
~joe*'i will destroy that ass'


BEST LAID .PLANS

forkingpaths
gaditb
hdh
insom
tape
tcreech
tdsmith
subtransience


WORST LAID .PLANS

santi


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Excerpt 2 from the Markov files.



Where you saw wit, I saw David Gest in October.
I have a thing that you'll algorithmically like.
It would appear that I love everyone!
Today is a queue for rubbing it in.
At least I'm heading for me.


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I made IRC things for you.



crossword The first thing I made using Tilde Town IRC data. Literally just inputting it into a JavaScript crossword generator. Quite cute as a first little project. here to say This is probably the best thing I'll ever make. roses are red A successor to Here To Say, but missing a certain something. Proof that some concepts live or die by the quality of their gifs. famouslastwords An anonymised output of the last lines that were spoken by each ~user in chat. Faces are generated with a ruby script, using the name as seed. Kinda nice, but too CPU intensive to cron.


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Poem Cut-Up — Wilfred Owen



War Trudge

Crouched by bluebells,
Stumbling and floundering,
I saw his eyes close.
Distant rest began to work its own death.
One dies of war trudge.

Dead men tried to peg out soldierly fatigue;
A scarlet ferry across the channel
Bent double like time.
All went lame but limped on,
Deaf even to the trudge.

His hanging face, him drowning.
The magnificent recession of
Disappointed froth-corrupted farewell.
We in Paradise are cursed and hurting.
In your fifty smothering dreams, you too.

Can't shake hands now.
Less life than white existence.
Even microbes have their backs
Towards our sev'rance.

If in some prejudiced parts
When I'm lugged gargling from the dust,
Bitter as the devil's sick
And ripped from far Nirvana...

    With my every jolt
    Being the wind,
    Nothing more than air...

Must I be his load?

— Let's die home
With any old disease
And miss the drowning.

We'd hate to live dead.


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A brief riddle.



So I come, and so I go,
A cyclops passing to and fro.
With carried colleague, thin and frail,
We leave our work: a footstep trail.


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Sonnet the Hedgehog.



What? That's it? That's all they got?
    Quickly, quickly, everyone on board.
Stay close! I want to tie this snake into a knot!
    It's working. We are getting power restored.

Sheesh, this place looks REALLY inviting!
    Awesome! More killer vines... Joy.
What? Figuring everything out? Keep fighting!
    I smell something to destroy!

Now there is a place for me to climb!
    Lots of damage... let's hope those cranes hold.
Upgrade to make Rings regenerate over time!
    Knocking down walls will not get old.

    We were able to locate the plants you desired.
    Nintendo 3DS Connect Required


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I made games for you.



tetris The only project I ever finished in Unity. It's a reasonably faithful port of Game Boy Tetris. It even includes the 'heart mode' Easter egg. pacman My attempt to make a Pac-Man clone using the disgusting ADABAS Natural language. zelda Coming soon... It's a secret to everybody.


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This Is Sweet To Say.




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A stream of unconsciousness.



a rubber can erase a pencil line but cant the memory
automated repeats repeat and repeated so much yawn
tissue clean white antiseptics made full of green now left
car is not alibve but moves is slave doenst know
tree has vines dangle and man can climb but they just break
shove them out of its way and bury them wastful
grain of the wood is veins and nerves hurt when was chopped
take the others words and mix them to be yours
ghost is upset wishes things were the same as when they were
turned it into a thing to put other things on
when they started it made sence but they kept on until it didnt
eventuall when you are gone no one will know
young boy arty teacher didnt thought but graffiti is not proper
can it be dirty when it is made of the earth
createful when i thought about how a mum is nice and so is a dad
paper is tree skin and ink is squid poision
imagine if you were a air fly bird and you had to swim somewhere
drink and i cant feel except well but is it
doorway is there but only for owner what is there we wlil not know
nun is dancing happy not from gods
imaniging that colour that sees when eyes are tight shut also shapes
oil is dinosaurs saying thank you
plasitc bottle full now drunk liquid now plastic bottle empty now left
morse code is radio heartbeats
thinking about a small cat but the cat cant be heard and wants to be listend
make a child turn it into what
try to use the computers byut keyboard is for hands and has no hands is difficult
wood is corpse lasts long


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Excerpt 3 from the Markov files.



picture yourself as a self as as selfsame self.

YOUR THOUGHTS ARE YOURS YOU



Could they explain the will? Could you?


it used to be so much smaller...


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Sonnet the Chrono Trigger.



According to my sensors, we are close to the center!
    I'd forgotten how beautiful they are.
Princess, not even you may enter.
    Only Cyrus made it this far.

This trading house. Many things for trade.
    Now we've got a winning team!
Enjoy yourselves at the moonlight parade!
    The past is dead. It was all just a dream...

Yet those memories most often are sad ones.
    Magus's army is awfully well trained!
Weapons include swords, bows, and guns.
    Aaah!! My powers are being drained!

    Listen well, my friends...
    ...this can't be the way the world ends...


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The snowball that started an avalanche.



i
am
not
your
happy
monkey


(        
a
ho
and
more
small
little
giggles
            )


i
do
not
mind
their
little
foolish
chortles
guffawing
accusingly


@SnowballPoetry


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I made Twitterbots for you.



name chain game My first Twitterbot! Tweets chains of celebrity names using a simple Markov model. After a while, the output started to become repetitive, so I called it quits. auto_automata Tweets the output image of a one dimensional cellular automaton. The December server reset broke the Ruby code, but I will cron this up again in future. snowball Tweets a short procedurally-made poem every day. These were curated from an output of literally millions of lines. I would comb through these to find ones that made sense. Then comb through those to find ones that were poetic. There was so much effort involved that I just had to stop. I hated that a human was doing most of the work. I felt this was dishonest for supposed procedurally generated content. This project was put to rest on New Year's Day 2017. If it ever is resurrected, it will be 100% automated.


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The Love Song of J. Alfred Emo-Rock.



Your eyes are as deep as a grave dug in sand.
Your lips are as red as the blood on my hands.
Your skin is as white as the bones of my ex.
Darling, if you won't be mine, you'll be next.


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Rhyming Poem Cut-Up — Walt Whitman.


I.
She comes! I hear the rustling of her gown,
  His polish'd and perfect limbs.
They rise together, they slowly circle around.

II.
I swear I will never henceforth have to do with the faith that tells
  Darkness, you are gentler than my lover, his flesh was sweaty and panting,
    Heard the continuous thunder as it bellow'd after the lightning,
  Of the mad pushes of waves upon the land, I them chanting,
A windrow-drift of weeds and shells.

III.
Cautiously peering, absorbing, translating.
  Gathering and showing more always and with velocity,
    Therefore I send you my poems that you behold in them what you wanted.
      With the poet, the skald, the saga, the myth, and the oracle,
    O to struggle against great odds, to meet enemies undaunted!
  Health, defiance, gayety, self-esteem, curiosity;
None born but it is born, conceal'd or unconceal'd the seed is waiting.


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Excerpts from The Book of Antiverbs.



It never rains.
Old habits die.
Beggars can't be.
An apple a day keeps.
A leopard cannot change.
Imitation is the sincerest.
The road to hell is paved.
The apple doesn't fall.
Money doesn't grow.
Don't judge a book.
Rome wasn't built.
Good things come.
Beauty is in the eye.
You can lead a horse.
Don't look a gift horse.
You can't have your cake.
A friend in need is a friend.
Don't put all your eggs in one.
A bird in the hand is worth two.


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I made good things for you.



life A JavaScript version of Conway's Life. My first biggish JavaScript project. If you want nightmares, view the source. christmas singalong Sing the words of well known songs and poems to the tune of varoius Christmas carols. Takes advantage of the fact that many songs are written in the common metre. chords A bunch of songs I want to play, but haven't memorised the chords yet. I play the piano, but often the chords online are for capoed guitar. So these are all transposed to be in their original key.


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now entereing!
nossidge's lol-out-loud komedy korner!
Here are some silly jokes for you and your buddies!


~~ The Natural World ~~

  What do you call a nice elephant?
  A SWELLephant!
  :-)

  What is a can-do rhinoceros?
  A rhiYESceros!
  (I have turned the no into a yes!)

  What is the most fun bumblebee?
  A FUNblebee!
  (Bees already are v good tho :-D)


~~ Politics and History ~~

  Who is the most delicious American presidents?
  1) AbraFLAN Lincoln!
  2) FLANdrew Jackson!
  3) Ronald ReagFLAN!

  Who are the most delicious UK prime minister?
  1) Theresa Maynards Wine Gums!
  2) David Macaroon! (sounds a bit like cameron)
  3) FLANley BaldFLAN!


~~ Lolitics and pre-History :-) ~~

  What do you call a sleepy stegosaurus?
  A stegoSNOREus!

  What is the velociraptor who does rapping?
  A velociRAPPER!

  Who is the best tyrannosaurus rex?
  Tyrannosaurus BEST!

  What is the spy name of a spinosaurus?
  It is SPYnosaurus!

  What if a triceratops had a mop?
  TriceraMOPS!


now exiting!
The nossidge laugh-out-loud komedy corner!
hope you enjoyed you're stay :-) :-)


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Sonnet the Final Fantasy VII.



I think you've lit my fuse!
    Once out in the desert, stay still and don't walk.
Don't get mad even if you lose.
    Did you say the Shinra!? What are they up to!? Talk!

You mean to tell me that's the extent of my powers?
    I came here by my own free will... Or so I thought.
The Promised Land will soon be ours.
    Me? I was mesmerized by the way Sephiroth fought.

Shinra, Inc. This week's phrase.
    But when I saw her, she looked fine.
She seems all right, ...in many ways.
    Damn! So they was just buyin' time!?

    I have the sheet music for that song.
    Don't forget me even if another Cait Sith comes along.


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Excerpt 4 from the Markov files.



centular mentumbellous dermentoserrate
flagenceous phrostrate sporangiosperm
trandoder rutescentation sporopeta
serifergic foliatio footrophorm
radiculate sagittation sticulostalk
zoophily schizocarpicula basipetalous
aceoussaxicocarpous marculate perennia


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I made bad things for you.



wisdom Almost-insightful, faux-perceptive semi-coherence. Inspired by the tweets of Yoko Ono and Jaden Smith. I actually kept this up for a few months, but didn't post them. I suppose I couldn't figure out what I was trying to tell myself. no one should ever hear this but ~karlen has a page compiling heartbreaking confessions and existential minutiae. I have a page compiling poorly played faux-blues key-of-C vampings. responsive robot This was the first responsive web page I ever wrote, circa 2005. Not terribly interesting to share, but it's web 1.0 and thus pretty tilde. unfinished toys My plan for this was a pairing of childrens toy reviews with disturbing images. I couldn't find enough pictures that would work, so I just abandoned the project. too many tooks This was at one point a Topical Meme. How the Internet forgets...


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Poem Cut-Up — Ted Hughes.



The world pours.

Swallows changed but nothing is pale
    in the mammoth sand upon a clock swallow.
It will flat in its whiplash hand corners
    and then to me; or else.

The dust earth of the root on its hill
    has cringe longer stickiness.
Summer, flies
    wounded the ocean.
The bones in the vice of the steel of inspection.

The owl roosting, collapsed a pig.
Convenience is her blue-dark glow.

Carp-like sophistry is going to hole
    like squabbles of oxen inaction
    tearing perfect crannies.
        A jab
    from the body: flings a jig.

    Bare-blown perfect tide-rip.
        With the swallow screech
    the sobbing depth
        slakes scissors at the top.
            The key feather:
                be idle.


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   <3<3  <3<3
 <3    <3    <3
<3            <3
<3            <3
 <3          <3
   <3      <3
     <3  <3
       <3


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There are more like us.


random ~user  |  random ~box  |  next ~user  |  join us