12 october 2023
Mastodon Thoughts
I've been thinking a lot about being on Mastodon. No real conclusions following, just dumping.
I originally tried 2022 but the instances I joined were boring and mid-moderated. Boring sounds
mean, but I do like to have some interesting conversations or fun ones from time to time. If I
just want to post with no interation, there are quite a few different venues that work better.
2023 seems to be better. I am on solarpunk.moe. There are a few people there I get along with. I
like the moderation. I don't hate anyone. but there are a lot of people not in my age group and
just nicely shitpost. I feel like I'm not vibing 100% and am looking for alteratives. I can still
follow/interact with the people I like.
Sometimes I wonder if I am using/looking for the wrong thing in Mastodon. Or using Mastodon to
replace other things. I like the conversations, news, microbites of information, art. I care less
for the miniquips. A part of my local to federated feed feels like LOL RANDOM. And I'm just speed
scrolling past it.
And now that I'm thinking about it... peak Twitter you followed people and if you just focus on
certain things you don't get the LOL RANDOM.
So I want more control and the design of Mastodon seems to be less feed control unless I just rss
feed only the folk I like and go about Mastadon this way. In fact I just might.
So I guess I do have a conclusion on this.
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08 october 2023
Its been awhile.
I've been spending a lot of time on Mastodon (https://solarpunk.moe/@jr_the_frog). Feel free to follow me on it.
I'm on letterboxd (https://letterboxd.com/jr_the_frog/) now and watch primarily short films. Feel free to add me!
Currently its Zinetober. I've been making some minizines. Two random thought ones. Two about the short films I've been watching.
I sent a zine I had laying around to a distro. Curious to see how long it will take to be set up.
I want to go to some zine fests the fall, but I guess it will depend on how I am feeling...
Nothing deep I guess...
Maybe I'll do a favorite films list soon...
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23 september 2023
Brain Dump Prompts for October 2023
What are your biggest goals for the month?
Finish a zine, go on trips, touch grass, remain organized managing the house, try not to be too depressed.
Can you think of a stressful task in your life that you’re avoiding?
Driving myself more? I'm not sure if its something I should do or not, due to personal issues.
What will truly make you happy?
Some nice weekend trips. Going to the Asian market. Going to the farmers market. Going to the petting zoo. Maybe a zine fest?
Is there someone you need to get back to?
I just did. Someone sent me a message in instagram in April, oops! That said I haven't been using instagram that much, so 🤷♂️
Where do you want to go on your next vacation?
The beach but this will probably be 2024.
How are you generally feeling at the moment?
Actually ok. Its Friday, my head is hurting less than it has been most of the month.
Are you devoting enough time for self care?
Maybe? I'm trying to think of self care things I need to do? I guess I could do more physical activity. Its been going down since summer ended and I stopped going to the beach.
Where do you want to be a year from now?
I want to be more involved in zine culture.
I want to be closer to paying off the house.
I want to be riding a bike regularly.
Do you have any regrets? If so, how can you move forward?
I don't know. I wish I had made more zines but I spent a lot of time at the beach so I don't 100% regret it. I guess a better balance.
What hobbies are you most interested in and why?
I like to swim and make zines. I want to get into cycling, so hoping this month to test an adult trike. I can't ride a regular bicycle.
Do you have any work projects you want to start?
No.
Did you go through a recent life change? How did it affect you?
I can feel fall. My headaches get worse. I love the cool temperatures and fall folliage but I dislike my body hurting.
When was the last time you cleared your inbox?
Never. Honestly thinking about moving everything to protonmail.
Are there any projects you need to get done at home?
Sooo many. I finally got Remember the Milk and input the most pressing ones there. They are slowly getting done.
What do you need to let go of?
Ideas of productivity without flexibility.
How can you best organize your upcoming appointments?
I use a calendar app on my phone.
What does your daily routine look like? Do you need to tweak anything?
I'm not even sure what to tweak. I get ready for work, work, eat, bathroom breaks, then after I do something fun if I can or sleep. I would like to be able to go out and do more things after work, but we'll see.
Have you congratulated yourself for achievements lately?
I celebrate the small things most daily. But I don't take a larger look. Maybe I should.
Do you need to start planning a bigger event, like a wedding or housewarming party?
Not really. The closest are trips I want to go on.
Are you spending enough time offline? How can you can create more of a balance?
Honestly I am spending more time to get podcasts, watch short film, connect with the zine and
Prompts from Nunzia Dreams - https://nunziadreams.com/clear-your-mind-brain-dump/
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03 august 2023
I felt sad today. To the point where I google a list of things to cheer me up. And reading that cheered me up? I have no clue what is going on with my brain somedays.
I am ok now.
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26 july 2023
7/24/23 - Feeling peaceful from the beach still. I'm thinking about moving there but it would
take years if I do it responsibly. My mental health has been bad for years. I'm fortunate and
don't enjoy it, which at least is a bit of a waste.
I'm listening to CL Polk's Witchmark as an audiobook
(https://app.thestorygraph.com/books/a8d4efa7-9b72-49d3-bc5c-d3c352b171f0). I'm enjoying my
time with it. Its a genre I generally don't bother with, urban mystery fantasy romance. This
one is slow and cozy. I'm not sure why I'm ok with this one. Its a tad cheesy but not
overwhelmingly so.
Another cranky day. I really thought about my irritability. My anxiety. I'm going to up my
meds (doctor ok'd) and see if that helps.
I'm also trying to be ok with my cranky self. That I can take care of my cranky self. This
seems to help.
7/25/23 - Sunny this morning, rainy at night.
I hate public bathrooms. I hate public bathrooms. I hate public bathrooms.
Just read Red Jellies by Lina Rather
(https://giganotosaurus.org/2020/02/01/thin-red-jellies/). Its about a young couple sharing a
body and the struggles it brings. I really liked it, but its not a happy story.
7/26/23 - Warm, not has humid as the previous few weeks. Okish outside. Although my spouse
and I tried to go to a trail after work. We quickly left due to mosquitos and lack of
repellent. Hopefully we will remember that for next time.
I did a bookshelf purge. I am getitng rid of most of my books. I'm looking at them but don't
feel much emotional attachment. I will be putting them in little free libraries. There are a
ton around and the books I put in tend to go fast, probably as they are nicer quality.
That said I do have a few books incoming. Not enough to fill my shelf but I appreciate the
room.
Before that, I am halfway through Some Desperate Glory by Emily Tesh with Sena Bryer
(Narrator). I am listening to the audiobook and Bryer does a phenominal job. Tesh's previous
novella dualogy (Greenhollow) was lovely. While I expected to have a solid time with this
novel, I didn't not expect it to rip my heart out. If it keeps going like this, will probably
be a top of the year.
"A thrillingly told queer space opera about the wreckage of war, the family you find, and who
you must become when every choice is stripped from you, Some Desperate Glory is Astounding
Award Winner and Crawford Award Finalist Emily Tesh’s highly anticipated debut novel."
Link: https://app.thestorygraph.com/books/d3554318-b227-4225-89c4-d93412272ec6
Incoming books:
1) The Dragon of Ynys by Minerva Cerridwen - Every time something goes missing from the
village, Sir Violet makes his way to the dragon's cave and negotiates the item's return. It's
annoying, but at least the dragon is polite.
But when the dragon hoards a person, that's a step too far. Sir Violet storms off to the
mountainside to escort the baker home, only to find a more complex mystery-a quest that leads
him far beyond the cave. Accompanied by the missing baker's wife and the dragon himself, the
dutiful village knight embarks on his greatest adventure yet.
The Dragon of Ynys is an inclusive fairy tale for all ages.
Link: https://app.thestorygraph.com/books/0085ebc5-e89a-4e93-a72e-79f3c2815baa
2) Escaping Exodus #1 by Nicky Drayden - Earth is a distant memory. Habitable extrasolar planets are still out of reach. For generations, humanity has been clinging to survival by establishing colonies within enormous vacuum-breathing space beasts and mining their resources to the point of depletion.
Rash, dreamy, and unconventional, Seske Kaleigh should be preparing for her future role as clan leader, but her people have just culled their latest beast, and she’s eager to find the cause of the violent tremors plaguing their new home. Defying social barriers, Seske teams up with her best friend, a beast worker, and ventures into restricted areas for answers to end the mounting fear and rumors. Instead, they discover grim truths about the price of life in the void.
Then, Seske is unexpectedly thrust into the role of clan matriarch, responsible for thousands of lives in a harsh universe where a single mistake can be fatal. Her claim to the throne is challenged by a rival determined to overthrow her and take control—her intelligent, cunning, and confident sister.
Seske may not be a born leader like her sister, yet her unorthodox outlook and incorruptible idealism may be what the clan needs to save themselves and their world.
Link: https://app.thestorygraph.com/books/6b6e3065-2add-4e1b-8509-ed0bf571251a
3) Skyward Inn by Aliya Whiteley - A thoughtful, literary novel about conflict, identity and
community, after Earth makes contact with the seemingly harmless planet Qita. A fresh new
perspective in speculative fiction from critically-acclaimed writer Aliya Whiteley.
Drink down the brew and dream of a better Earth.
Skyward Inn, within the high walls of the Western Protectorate, is a place of safety, where
people come together to tell stories of the time before the war with Qita.
But safety from what? Qita surrendered without complaint when Earth invaded; Innkeepers Jem
and Isley, veterans from either side, have regrets but few scars.
Their peace is disturbed when a visitor known to Isley comes to the Inn asking for help,
bringing reminders of an unnerving past and triggering an uncertain future.
Did humanity really win the war?
Link: https://app.thestorygraph.com/books/ffb7b385-e101-45a6-94c1-5e53055621c0
4) Royal Rescue by A. Alex Logan - At age eighteen, when they become marriageable, all royal
children in the Thousand Kingdoms must either go questing to rescue another royal or be
hidden away to await rescue themselves. Some go the traditional route of princes rescuing
princesses, but not all princes want to be rescuers...and some would rather rescue other
princes.
Then there's Prince Gerald, who has no interest in getting married at all. When he refuses to
choose a role as either rescuer or rescuee, his royal parents choose for him and have him
magicked away to a distant tower to await a spouse.
Gerald, however, is having none of it. He recruits his guardian dragon and a would-be rescuer
and soon the trio is dashing to all corners of the united kingdoms on a quest to overturn the
entire system.
Link: https://app.thestorygraph.com/books/68bd9ee4-f23d-46e3-b013-f316fbd1cda9
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24 july 2023
7/20/23 - I slept all of Thursday morning. Its Thursday afternoon. I'm still not great, not
looking forward to tomorrow. I need to return to work. I should be ok. Hopefully.
I'm tired but can't sleep. Slept too much.
I've caught up with Sad Boyz (https://sadboyzpod.com/). I am now listening to The Golden Age
of Internet Piracy by Srsly Wrong (https://srslywrong.com/). Such good stuff, its amazing how
consistently knowledge, accessible and quality this podcast is.
7/21/23 - Whelp I discovered c2pa while trying to sleep. Sleep avoided! Stuff like this makes
me wonder how long until the stuff I like in inaccesible.
I'm trying to find some fun, escapist media to not worry and reduce my anxiety. Its not
working. I am in a deep crank state where everything annoys me. Even stuff I probably would
enjoy in a better mood. I wish I could leave myself for a bit until morale improves.
Later - My mood is a bit better. But still looking for fun things to distract me. But I'm
always drawn to something with a little bit of politics or educational content. I used to
enjoy fiction a lot more. I wonder why this changed. Although I do want to catch up on the
latest Murderbot book.
Later 2 - My library haul came in. I read 2 graphic novels: Red Rosa: A Graphic Biography of
Rosa Luxemburg by Kate Evans and Covid Chronicles. Honestly some heavy stuff that ripped my
heart out. Dr. Luxemburg is such an interesting person, basically writing about globalization
50 years before the term is coined. And now I'm looking into her writings.
7/22/23 - Finally went to the asian market and got good stuff. Including cilantro and mint.
Time to have rice stick noodles, duck, nuoc mam and the fresh herbs. Om nom nom.
Still cranky and a bit hurty after all that walking around.
Interesting:
Saving the Tiny Bog Turtle Could Have a Big Impact on Conservation -
https://appvoices.org/2023/04/25/saving-bog-turtle/
On The Work of Sex Work with Matilda Bickers by The Final Straw Radio -
https://thefinalstrawradio.noblogs.org/
My short midgnight.pub post - https://midnight.pub/posts/1483
Basic First Aid for Emergencies Zine - https://www.tangledwilderness.org/skills-series
7/23/23 - I will never have all the zines and it makes me sad.
(https://antharris.co/2022/06/14/zines-1-32/)
7/24/23 - I went to the beach yesterday. Sand and seawater on my feet. I feel at peace.
Sharing:
Wild Heart Homestead - https://tickfoot.sensorstation.co/
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20 july 2023
7/17/23 - I still feel awful. I didn't do much. I listened to a lot of the Sad Boyz podcast with my eyes closed. Its soft masc
goodness.
7/18/23 - My head is still awful, but my body doesn't feel punched all over. Progress! I
have a dr appt today. Radiology to test my bone density. This is due to medicine I am taking
that could possibly thin my bone desnity.
My usb came in. I am going to put Linux Lite on it. I want a more private OS/web
experience. I also want to archive websites/documents. Stuff I'm not sure will be accessible
in the coming years. Wayback/Archive.org is nice, but again will it last forever?
I'm even using Tor now! But probably best on a Linux OS.
Trying to download Linux Lite for my usb. Crossing my fingers, it already failed once but
I don't want to torrent.
I wonder if I should describe my entire testing linux lite saga. Its peak noob
foolishness. I didn't realize the Os would not save. I'm still not sure how to accomplish
this. I also activated windows bitlocker (windows is my main os currently) and was fighting
with my various microsoft accounts to find the key so I could get back into windows. Which
has all of my logins and some documents I want to back up.
I received a reading recommendation from grende184. I'm about halfway through it. I will
probably give it another go as I don't trust my sick brain memory. But what I did get, was
thoughtful and made me reflect on my own thoughts regarding folk like arts, artists, etc.
Games I played before I got sick (online twine games):
- I just played a game called Stranger's
Contact. Its a Twine game that is intentionally unpleasant to play, as it is about
being a 15 year old girl being pestered by creeps on the internet. The experience of
clicking around and the text styling is rather slick. I recommend it as an experience and
to see what folk can do with Twine.
- One Killer, Six Suspects - I enjoyed this
one, and its interesting how the murderer can change depending on your choices. A solid
mystery.
- Now I'm playing Beware The Faerie Food You Eat by Astrid
Dalmady. Incredibly atmospheric. I keep dying horribly. It makes sense.
Podcasts/Videos I want to share as they are really good.
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17 july 2023
Blergh. Another sick day. I feel like I'm meling, the room is spinning and want to puke. I
also want thick, creamy soup my stomach won't tolerate due to lactose intolerance. The Panera
broccoli cheddar or wild rice soup in a bread bowl comes to mind.
I started a new game
of Avernum: Escape
from the Pit. Its an old crpg that has a lot of little loot and story bits to find. Lots
of killing things and getting treasure. Its and interesting, slow build of a game with
different ending routes. This one feels like it is going quickly, as I understand the combat
and leveling up better.
I listened to:
Anark Interview with SRSLY WRONG | Revolutionary
Prefiguration - SRSLY WRONG is an overall amazing, upbeat Utopian podcast. A way to think
about positive changes without ending up in a doomerist pit of desapir. This one is about
preconfiguration, or small changes that build up.
Zoe Baker on Anarchism and Marxism | From Alpha to Omega
Podcast
ADHD, Capitalism and Disability
Activism, Written by the Solidarity Federation - I'm most interested in disability
political stuff. Especially considering how mainstream liberal disability politics is about
those who are more exploitable by capitalism tossing those who are less under the bus
(paraphrasing from the audio). Something that isn't sustainable long term.
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16 july 2023
I'm making a diary with Twine 2. Its fun to play around with the text effects.
I'm making a homepage via twine but with a text adventurey flavor. Wish me luck.
Wanted to go out, but flash flood warnings. Last weekend was like this too. Bleh. I'm better than yesterday but not 100%
I am at a point where I don't really like drawing. I spent some money on art supplies though. :/ Maybe when the weather improves so will
my overall mood.
I'm really buckling down on spending going forth. I could finish paying off all my debts in a few years if I do so. I like the idea of
them not hanging over my head.
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15 july 2023
I'm still poking around tilde. Its simultaneously overwhelming and interesting.
I joined a discord server to learn about communism and will probably leave after I copy all of the resource links. It was an unpleasant atmosphere. Very judgemental of others while also making logical leaps.
I'm thinking of joining another one regarding anarchism. I hope its better.
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