m455's poetry

here is some poetry to externalize big feelings i've experience in my life. sometimes the words come to me from nothing (at least, it seems like it's from nothign--it's probably not nothing, though), and sometimes they come to me when i have feelings that are evoked in me from music and/or scenery.

with my poetry, i originally aimed to get out stuck feelings that diary-style journalling wouldn't do for me. specifically, the overwhelming physical sensations that i get from big emotions.

but, lately, i've realized that that's not the only thing i'm doing--i discovered that i'm also trying to recreate how i felt while i was writing each poem by providing what i saw or heard while i was writing on instagram. the only problem, is that and visuals don't exist here--only the written part of the poem. i wan't to change this some day, when my brain will let me.

i list the newest poems at the top of the lists below, but here's a little table of contents for jumping between the years if this shit continues to grow lol:

2026

  1. woops
  2. 2:00am miracles
  3. 2026-03-17-858pm.txt
  4. at plantains and caviar (12:32am)
  5. at plantains and caviar (i think around the start?)
  6. 2026-03-15-824pm.txt
  7. you as a stew
  8. 2026-03-10 10:39pm
  9. 2026-03-10 1:00am
  10. you won't know until
  11. an overcast day
  12. for jumblesale
  13. 2026-03-04 4:26pm
  14. 2026-03-03 11:06am
  15. reframing it
  16. 2026-02-27 11:27pm
  17. your presence matters to me
  18. stuff you like
  19. what the fuck happened
  20. your presence matters to me
  21. guide me (2026)
  22. back on my feet
  23. angry
  24. shine hard
  25. call-me-by-my-nam3
  26. done
  27. done
  28. 2026-02-17 2:14am
  29. you acted
  30. the stroke
  31. 2026-02-16 6:37pm
  32. 2026-02-16 6:00pm
  33. 2026-02-16 2:04am
  34. 2026-02-13 11:23pm
  35. 2026-02-13 10:48pm
  36. an exchange of energy
  37. diffused
  38. life's too short
  39. you've got this
  40. fountains of blood
  41. when i'm with you two
  42. monetized rest
  43. a kissing monnection
  44. restoring one's self
  45. coasting
  46. yet you want more
  47. no fear
  48. unable
  49. love and joy
  50. gone
  51. a chapter done
  52. friends are there
  53. all is released
  54. released
  55. stuck
  56. into nothing
  57. it's really hard
  58. grow with me
  59. growing
  60. don't care
  61. damnit
  62. removed from life
  63. until the mourning
  64. misuse me
  65. you dumb fuckup
  66. two sweethearts
  67. your answer is where you're not
  68. poke holes
  69. pottery
  70. filling in the spaces
  71. the labrynths of life
  72. i'm doin alright
  73. the essence
  74. i was a tourist
  75. i am me
  76. i miss them
  77. i'm coming
  78. buttered fingers
  79. i can't talk to people

2025

  1. house of targ
  2. fucked by life
  3. softened
  4. water bottle
  5. im losing my mind
  6. dead leaf in a forest
  7. my mind in time
  8. no name
  9. death and a goodbye
  10. it came to this
  11. project myself
  12. hard
  13. fake love
  14. i want to but i cant
  15. im almost back
  16. you live
  17. for my wizard friend
  18. a place of warmth
  19. life, fuckin cut it out, man
  20. make it all stop
  21. lock me in a box
  22. broke free by limits
  23. lost in a forest
  24. im broken
  25. vanished
  26. bashed against the wall
  27. spoon
  28. hemorrhage
  29. surrounded in warmth
  30. only the forest may hear me
  31. i didn't know
  32. alone
  33. the father, the son, and the holy spirit
  34. pain
  35. between the weight
  36. emptied
  37. i can no longer do
  38. the night sky will always be there for me
  39. body disconnected
  40. at night
  41. not again
  42. that moment
  43. every detail
  44. have a seat beside me
  45. you never made room
  46. nothing prepares you for this
  47. fast thoughts
  48. blast off
  49. fall sunset
  50. depressed
  51. submerged
  52. park bench
  53. cover my skin
  54. sit back and relax
  55. let it pass
  56. getting through it
  57. what do you want from this
  58. hang my coat up
  59. mind
  60. remove the watifs
  61. the by-product of torment
  62. thriving, blooming
  63. bathe in comfort
  64. guide me
  65. tried my best
  66. cooled down
  67. hurt hidden by anger
  68. bleachers
  69. numb for now
  70. lift me up
  71. to be heard
  72. please, mother nature
  73. attacked
  74. still here
  75. my soul is complete
  76. here to live
  77. clear headed, mostly
  78. vulnerable
  79. feelings
  80. refusal
  81. fountain
  82. i want you
  83. hang in there
  84. puffs
  85. tear me apart
  86. blood
  87. sunbleached
  88. for friends
  89. unstoppable
  90. unleash
  91. re-entering this world
  92. from your point of view
  93. hold onto it tight
  94. pause life
  95. in the driver's seat
  96. you told me
  97. don't tell me
  98. handle yourself
  99. happiness on a string
  100. i see
  101. a love letter to nail painting
  102. who i thought i was
  103. i am
  104. torn out of myself
  105. a different sky
  106. keeping going
  107. a hug from mother nature
  108. mind vs fire
  109. pulled back into reality
  110. dust
  111. my brain fills my chest
  112. a blanket of chimes
  113. this rock
  114. in another place
  115. finger feelings
  116. grainy lights
  117. i am the coal of your tree
  118. i thought it was me i thought it was them
  119. i know you're somewhere in there
  120. you need to
  121. almost taken over
  122. above all, stretched too thin
  123. tiptoeing towards despair
  124. its gone
  125. on that island
  126. it hits harder when you feel like you've got nothing left
  127. warm body glazed mind
  128. i can let me be me
  129. day dreaming another brain