i used to tear myself apart
for who i am and what i do
i still do, but i'm working on that

i learned that some things can be done to me by them
but those things aren't always good or bad

i learned this is a two-way thing
they regulate themselves, they do to me
i regulate myself, i do to them

i can learn to regulate myself
i will go through the never-ending journey of learning my needs
i can have wants that don't need to be justified

i cannot regulate others, i can only create a pleasant environment for others
i should not put the creation of a pleasant environment for others over my own needs

i can allow myself to regulate myself,
while leaving the responsibility of others' self regulation on themselves

i can provide guidance, but it is not my responsibility
and i should not overburden myself to do this too much

self regulation is a skill that is practiced and improved over a life time
and lack of it, will destroy you, and those around you

it teaches you how to not only create boundaries and needs for yourself
but it also teaches you understanding and compassion for others
it teaches you how to be patient with someone, even when they aren't being nice to you
it teaches you that you can teach them how to do this for others
and discover their own hardships that, they too, can overcome

it teaches you how amazing human beings can be to each other
it teaches you support for loved ones,
and that loved ones can be friends too