blog / failure silver lining

Just realized a (the only?) positive aspect of 100% of my creative labor being sold to an amoral capitalist paperclip-maximizing corporate monstrosity:

At least when I’m “underperforming” or I have blown out an estimate by a ridiculous amount, it is to the detriment of that machine.

It still feels bad, because there are trickle down effects for some of the other actual humans attached to the machine, and I would prefer the good feeling of knowing my skills make me a highly productive cog but

if I were doing the public-interest users-first open-source free-software not-for-profit work that I’ve been wanting to do for so long, I think I’d feel soooo much worse about missing a dealine or under-performing in any way.

It’s good… that I’m not?

No, I won’t go that far. The world needs more work done in the public interest, even if it’s by shitty ol’ me.