Christianity as an Agnostic

They say you that you have a god-shaped hole in your heart, and that you can't fill it yourself, with worldly things. That second part just isn't true, though. You do have a "god-shaped" hole in your heart, it's a hole that needs connection; it needs someone to see it, to look at it, to experience what you're going through with you, to sit there with you and love you. The lie is saying you can't do that for yourself. You are spirit, you are full of love, even if it's buried. Only you can literally be there with yourself, experience what you're experiencing with you, and support yourself through it. Being mindful with yourself, staying present and observing all of the feelings and thoughts you are dealing with, coming to understand the depth of your pain but choosing to be there with yourself, bearing witness to your own suffering and developing compassion for yourself, that is the true essence of loving yourself. We are all hurt beings, with wounds, with spike traps guarding particularly traumatized areas, keeping us from getting near, restricting access to ourselves. It's okay, they are all coping mechanisms. They're all due to deep suffering. Take the time to grieve for your suffering. Love. Love yourself. Be tender. Give yourself a hug! Kiss yourself. Like a parent does to their child; with all the adoration they can possibly give.