02 september 2022
Behold, the bag of mixed feels!
Vacation!
I've been off of work since Friday of last week, and it's been really nice, but also exhausting. We've been going out and doing a lot of things, and today's plan is to just have a very chill sort of day with not a lot going on. It's also highlighted how much I needed a break from work, how much I've needed something to change about work, and how much burnout I might actually be having right now.
Gender!
There's this interesting thing that has happened to me where I'm a little hesitant to "put on feminitity" when going out. I'm not terribly fond of makeup -- there's a component of how much work it takes, and the question of whether it's for me, or for someone else. However, I'm also considering whether or not I need to seriously invest in wearing a bra for protection and support purposes, and that's a new and fun endeavor. By fun I mean terrifying. I'm... well, I'm not constructed like your typical cisgender woman, and that means that whatever bra I'm going to need will be probably in an atypical size, and navigating all of that sounds absolutely exhausting. Tl;Dr - the further I get in my gender journey, the more I feel like I haven't gotten as far as I thought.
Technology!
This is mostly my petty ranting about how my current phone has had terrible wifi for months now and also just started outright ignoring the one wifi network that was working for a while. So, new phone ordered, and... it's past the estimated delivery date, and the phone company is not giving me any helpful information about, oh, idk, the location of the phone right now or when it might show up. Grr!
There's a lot of other stuff going on as well, so suffice it to say that I'm a bit of a mish-mashy-mess of feels and goings-on.