09 august 2021
Switched to a top bar instead of a bottom one today- kept meaning to but never had the motivation to deal with a significant visual change. Pretty happy with it now that it's done! Going to take some getting used to but it feels more natural on a laptop and it's easier to glance at for information now (which is why it's there in the first place). It's got us motivated to see if we can add some color to the information so it's easier to read at a glance. Something we're finding very nice is picking colors and placement for ease of understanding in addition to looking pleasant- the more time goes on, the more ways we find to increase usability without sacrificing aesthetics. Going to play with Waybar some more and see what we can do. I think adding color to the battery readout and CPU temp would be a good start.
Goofed up and ate dinner 2 hours late last night, which would be fine if our brain didn't flip out when a routine is broken. You know when you're so hungry that you get emotional and it's like "feed me in 5 minutes or I'm going to cry?" Yeah. Not doing that again in the near future.
Also wound up doing some vent art last night because the late dinner threw us off and had to get that anxiety out somehow. It helped and now we have nice art. I swear that the things we draw to get emotions out where the motto is "it doesn't have to look good" somehow look better than the things we're trying to make it look appealing do. Maybe we should draw like that more often.
On a more positive note, we get to see a friend on Tuesday! Excited, I've missed them and they're very nice to be around. Kind of a gender presentation inspiration too. He's bigender and absolutely rocks it, and it's nice to see her mix things up and screw with gender norms. It's given us courage to do the same. That's a pattern, really- seeing people be authentically themselves gives people courage to do the same, whether that be us or someone else. It's worth the initial anxiety because not only does it feel nice to be yourself, but it helps people like you too.
Also, to all the folks questioning gender, we do see your feels- been there, it's rough but give yourself time and it'll work out. You don't need to latch onto any one label or be any particular way if you don't want to. Find what feels right, play around with it, and don't be afraid to experiment. You'll be okay. Figuring out gender really is a process but it's one that's incredibly worth it. It's like really seeing yourself for the first time.