29 may 2024
Guide needed for a Public persona online
I have nostalgia for early facebook, which will likely never circle back again. I loved the freedom of being myself, online. Not the anonymous, 'free' version of myself I could always be online, but the freedom to exist as my true identity, with my name, face, real world location, and real world friends, all extended online.
Early AIM was similar, in the sense that my contacts list was full of people I knew from school. Where I could exist online as an extension of who I was in the physical world.
Today, it feels as if I don't have as many in-person friends. Taking this tangent briefly; I've always felt stronger human connections when I spent a large part of my life around other people -- in school, in jobs with a large cohort of staff mixing around, with enough time and freedom to sometimes talk or spend time with those people, and see what they were about. These days, I have a long tail of people I know, folks I remember, fleeting connections, gossamer strands, extending outward from me, maybe like lines to a parachute canopy. That's a more apt image than a spider's web, surely. But those lines float out there, unmaintained, untested, and it feels like I am sometimes in free-fall.
But that's not what I wanted to talk about. I wanted to talk about early Facebook
That time when anyone you knew in real life was likely to interact with you online. I miss that.
These days, I'm not on the predatory social medias. I mean, my old accounts are still there. And here's where my paranoia starts.
On one hand, I want to leave them up, as an archive of who I was in the old days. The facebook of high school and college. And small constellation of other sites with my name, face, and information about what it means to be me.
But on the other hand, it's not as safe as it was back then. If people haven't figured out yet how to use images of you, text of you, and innocuous bits of information about you, they will soon. So it's probably not a good idea to leave those up. Shit.
That's not what I wanted to talk about either. I wanted to talk about what felt so right about early facebook. And how I want to try capturing some of that lightning in a little fedi-shaped bottle.
It felt right
It felt right to be myself online It felt right to use my name It felt right to talk about where I lived It felt right to talk with other people I know It felt right to share pictures of myself, and see pictures of my friends It felt right to organize local events, and see who was planning on going, and discover things that way
Some things will never be the same
I might not be able to use my name, but maybe I can? It may not be advisable to publicly post images of my likeness If I share other details, I need to be careful that they do not constitute a liability of some kind Most people I know in real life will not join "free" social networks. At least not at first. At best I'll be an early adopter. At worst I'll be publicly myself in a realm where I don't know the other people, but they'll know me.
-- Quick aside, what editor am I even in?
I'll need to find out other ways of discovering local events, and it will probably not be based on who else do I know who is going, which is really sad
Public and Private Identity?
I guess I'm looking for the Marie Kondo of online privacy and identity. The person to take in all the information, and proclaim, this is what you can share. This is what you must keep private. As far as I can tell, no one is doing this... maybe because privacy is so elusive? There are plenty of guides to how to protect your privacy when you are trying to be anonymous. But what if you want to be yourself? Is there a safe middle ground?
Here is what I imagine.
Assumptions
If
- If the information I share is relatively private and ephemeral, and
- If I refrain from sharing searchable, personally identifiable details, like name, address, etc., (Why did the editor wordwrap here...? Is it because I used an asterix? And why isn't it word wrapping now???
- If I stick to relatively generic details, i.e., broad strokes about my life,
interests (it word wrapped here too!!!??) location
- But the quesiton is -- how broad?
- If no one is collecting my postings for posterity and running analysis on it to identify me from my word choice and writing style
Then
- Then it should be safe to talk with, and connect to, people who are somewhat in the same physical location as me
- Then it should be safe to share some personal details without that information remaining public for the rest of my life
- Then it should be possible to be myself online, somewhat
What about Real Name, Photos?
- Photos may never be safe, I'm not sure. That's very sad. I've heard too many stories of people using technology to create false photos using publicly available photos, or to identify you in a crowd / in public based on publicly identifyable photos of yourself.
- It may be safe to use your Real Name, but only in association with details that you would be comfortable with everyone in the world, in present, and future, forever, to know about you. As of now I don't have a good idea what details I would be comfortable sharing "forever." I think the reason here is, if someone has reason to wish you harm, they can use almost anything as ammunition. :(
Conclusion
- I'd like to research and distill what I'm comfortable sharing online
- I wish I knew how to share this with others