26 january 2025
I'm making a resolution to try and stay unbothered by what people say, do or try to make me feel. Specifically, I am making a resolution to redefine what is, and is not, allowed to affect me. I will try my best to see if what I am being made to feel is a good, or a bad emotion, and then make a conscious effort to ignore it. It'll be easier said than done, but I hope that this process makes me stronger. I am also going to try and journal more often, whether here or elsewhere. It does help to put words to paper (or terminal) and then come back to look at them in 45 minutes. The alternative would be to cover those things, those ruminations, with the person who caused them, and because of my BPD, they're not always (read: almost NEVER) logical, sound and completely rooted in reality. This makes it far easier for me to not exhaust myself, learn to be steadfast and learn what I stand for, as well as make sure that I am able to better articulate it to whoever is concerned.