2 october 2025
Good morning town! I slept poorly, but I feel fine. If I have a crash at lunchtime to need to take a nap, that's fine. I had a good day yesterday and I am not stopping today.
I don't know if I am waking up randomly because I'm cold, or if I'm waking up randomly because I've still got shit on my mind, which gives me chills. I think it's the former. Every time I go to bed in warmer clothes, I sleep well, but I do not have enough of a sample size to confirm this is the cause. I am going to get a comforter upstairs tonight and see if that makes any difference.
I am excited for the concert tomorrow! I'll spend today practicing some contained, low-space-requirement dance moves, and also do my makeup. I will also see if I can push things along to meet in person with someone that I've met online. I did accidentally ghost someone who I was gonna go out with on Tuesday at 8pm, but I was not in any shape to go out anyway, so I would've had to cancel. I did apologize, though.
I hope that I am able to get over the fear of being misunderstood. Moreover, I hope that I am able to afford to set boundaries with people who are misunderstanding me anyway, not to be mean to them, but to not give them any grace if they will keep misunderstanding me or attributing words to me. I am more mature than that, so I should not stoop to that level.
Another thing I am looking forward to is town con. As scary as it will be to fly somewhere else in the US for a weekend, I am excited about the prospect of meeting even one person to whom I owe my continued existence and many joyous moments. I am excited about the prospect of touring places like the Internet Archive HQ, which long ago were entirely inaccessible, magical places somewhere on the other side of the planet. That being said, I forget just how many opportunities the move to the United States opened up for me. I blame this forgetting on political doom and gloom obscuring my actual possibilities and perspectives, leaving me with only cheap thrills to populate my day. I should 100% invest more in these future perspectives. I must respect myself and my future beyond the next ten days. That is one habit that I picked up from my ex that I must kick at once.
It's almost 4pm, and I am not looking forward to having to do my second job, which is that game development. I enjoy the work, but I am so thoroughly drained and done by the end of the work day that I cannot get more than 1-2 hours of work done on the game. Bwuh.
One of the customers I helped the other day was the owner/proprietress of the company. One of her employees was having phone issues, with some warning that she didn't know the cause of. I fixed said employee's issue, and the owner/proprietress responded as she was CC'd. She responded in her 48pt Comic Sans email client default setting, "EXCELLENT! THANK YOU ANDREJ! YOU ARE THE BEST!" This warmed my heart to no end :') there is kindness in the world. I am always happy to help <3