03 december 2024
im sick today and i hate it. i wrote a song really quick about being sick and using my phone and recorded it on my phone (ironically), cutting out all the bullshit. i was watching a panel about butch trans women from 2011 i found by looking at the youtube channel of a spoken word piece about transmysoginy that was shared on tumblr. i later posted a link to the video and some thoughts about connecting with people on the internet. im especially fixated on connection through screens when im sick because obviously i cant go outside, although that is obviously much prefered. im kinda burnt out on fedi/mastodon/whatever because i dont really feel content with any of the instances ive been on the past like 3 years. i like my tumblr blog but i dont reallyyyy have any mutuals on there, not the same way i did on fedi. plus its hard to have anything worth posting about when you're sick and not leaving the house. posting is stupid i just wanna go to emo shows 24/7. maybe i can start filling my calendar up with emo gigs going forward. i am perpetually disillusioned and aimless always everything is stupid and pointless blahh blah blah blahhhhhhh i missed karaoke today because im sick i go everyyy monday,, i had plans to hang out with a new friend too :< i hope i feel better by the weekend cause i have plans but i will probably have to cancel on jamming with my friends this wednesday womp womp.