04 september 2017
let's think about how this started
i remember talking to you late at night
were we would sometimes complain about random crap
or get caught up discussing something terribly inconsequential
and sometimes you'd fall asleep
and i'd scroll up and re-read some of the texts
back when we used to text, everything stayed on my phone
and i'd go back a few days at a time
and try to pick up on any small detail i missed on the original conversation
juust in case i could show that i remembered,
to impress you
i remember the night i said
i'd much rather go on date you
and you seemed disinterested
and i thought i'd messed it up
but it turned out, it was all a misundestanding
and i laughed at the end because you said you liked me
after dropping the ball with every new text, you come out and say things are alright
i wasn't afraid to get closer after that
and then, one night
you said we should stay friends
then after shedding a tear or two
i thought the best to do was not to force
a relationship that should not happen
i tried to close my eyes, and not think about you
and i failed
you were there in the night, in my dreams, and the following morning
and that morning, i understood
all my heart wanted was to
stay by your side
a few weeks later,
after ice skating
when you said we should remain friends a little longer
i couldn't handle it
and made mistakes
im sorry
i couldnt bear the thought of losing you
after that night, i knew all i wanted to do is
stay by your side
after i started working
i realized the biggest sacrifice i've made
was the time i couldnt dedicate to you
after long shifts, the reward was always saying goodnight to you
and maybe talk a bit
i know your parents aren't thrilled about us
and i understad that, i really do
if at any time
you feel like i would leave you
if at any time
you think i wont be willing to stay with you
if at any time
you think that i'll "jump"
please remember that
after every single obstacle we've come across
i stayed with you