23 september 2026
Been a couple days off since my last feel...
The day off before last we went to Ikea to find furniture for the shop. We found a nice stand up display
case to put expensive things in. Then we went to Home depot, Barnes and Noble and Daiso and I boght Katie
things for her birthday that was coming up. We ended the night at home with the dog.
Which leads me to the last day off, yesterday...
Katie and I talked and made the tough decision that it is Tesla's time. Since my last feel about her, her
energy and demeanor has declined to a point where we don't think she's happy anymore. She seems to be lost
and in pain more than she's not and she really needs to be coaxed into eating anything. We decided to have
the vet come to the house where she'll be comfortable and send her off to whatever's next. It's going to
happen next Monday, if not soooner.
Since we made the decision, life has been a waking dream. I've just been disassociating from everything
and going through the motions. I feel like I've been slowly grieving Tesla's passing over the last
few weeks so it comes and goes in little waves now as I realize all the little things that she won't be
there for anymore. I'll make a sandwich and realize she won't be there to beg for scraps. I'll be in
the garage and realize she won't be there to come looking for me and settle down next to me as I worked.
I'll be in the backyard reading a book and look over to the spot she usually sat outside and realize
I'll never see her sitting there again.
I wasn't gonna make this post, because I wanted to keep this blog mostly positive. But I needed to say
this stuff. The shop has been slow lately and when I'm here I'm by myself unless Katie is here with me,
which is rare since we want to have one of us at home with Tesla. I feel like when it finally does happen
I'll be sort of relieved. It's real tough seeing her the way she is every day.
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14 september 2026
Late day off blog. The day off was last week and there's a day off tomorrow!
On the last day off, we decied to go hiking. We went to Point Lobos and it was gorgeous. Lots
of beautiful coastal trails and we saw some historic stuff pertaining to the old whalers that used
to live and work out there. There was an old painting of part of the beach showing the people in boats
bringing in the whale stuff and the picture depicted the spot we parked at. Neat!
After that we went shopping to get some things we needed, like new clothes for our friends' wedding
this weekend and a new tube for my bike's tire. Then we came out and just hung out with the dog and
played some more Baldur's gate together.
All in all, a good chill day.
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5 september 2026
Well...
The last day off was kind of an emotional one. We've been leading up to this time for a while now, but
now that it's actually arrived I'm having a hard time processing.
It sure seems like I am seeing the last days of my old dog Tesla. She is going to be 15 years old in about
a month. Over the last year she's started to develop bad arthritis and some kind of balance thing so she's
not able to keep steady when she's upright. Lately taking her on walks has been tough, but walks were
always her favorite thing as she's been very active and curious her whole life, so we got her a little
cart to pull her in when she gets too tired to walk.
The last week has been kinda bad. Her energy has dropped to an all time low and she often doesn't want to
eat. The young, spry, happy, stubborn, ornery little dog I've known her whole life is gone and a different
dog has taken her place and it's all starting to hit me all at once. I don't know how long I have left with
her. It might be a few months, it might be a few weeks.
I've been trying my best not to take her for granted. So on my day off, we decided to stay in and hang out
with her as much as we could and we could tell she was fairly happy that day. She goes up and down in terms
of her mood and energy, so I'm realizing that I'm going to really treasure when I see her happy. There are
times when I catch her eyes and that young dog is still in there, but more and more I see her and she looks
lost or scared or hurting and it breaks my heart.
I always knew this time would come, since the day we got her. But now that it's here it hurts like hell
and I'm having a real time of it. :(
It was 2011 and Katie and I had been together for a year and some change. We decided the time was right
in our relationship to get a puppy. We went to the SPCA website and found a dog we wanted, "Riley", and
set out to go pick him up. When we walked into the building we saw another couple leaving with Riley in
their arms. Dejected but determined we went inside anyway to see if any other pups caught our eye and we
saw "Guiness". Guiness had a sister, but it was her that we were drawn to. She seemed so fun and bumbly
and when we took her into the play room so see how she did around us all she wanted to do was play with
the toys. We knew she was the dog. When we took her home, we named her in the car. Tesla. And she always
did love her toys her whole life.
All I want is that we can take care of her the best we can as long as we can and that the good days
outweight the bad ones while we still have her. I'm coming to grips with the fact that I'll never play
fetch or tug of war with her again, I'll never see her running from one end of the backyard to the other
to greet me after coming home, and she won't be able to "get" anybody anymore. But as long as she can
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27 august 2026
A pretty dang chill day off,
We had planned to go out and see a movie, but Katie weasn't really feeling that and
wanted to go bum around to look at Halloween stuff instead. She had an appoitment with
her mom to get some self care for her mom's birthday, so I stayed around the house
for a bit playing old computer games. Mostly Baldur's Gate 1 and Diablo 2.
After she got back, we set out and made a few stops. Got burritos for lunch, went
grocery shopping, then picked up coffee for now and beer for later. We got home
and took naps then woke up and just... hung out. One of those days which are lazy
and nice. We spent the evevning drinking our beer and playing Baldur's Gate 3 together
split screen on the PS5.
All in all, a good day!
-milo
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19 august 2026
New day off post!
Yesterday was a fantastic day off. :)
Katie and I spent the day bumming around Monterey before heading to our friends' house
for Vietnamese food and fun.
We went to the record store first where I got a David Gilmour CD for $10. Woohoo! Katie
found the Ryo Fukui album Scenery on CD as well so she picked that one up. After the
record store we went to a small coffee shop near the post office and got iced mochas and
sat on the patio drinking them. Monterey is full of old adobe buildings that have been
retro-fitted into other things and this coffee shop was one of them. I love good local
history and I was trying to imagine what the building may have been in its previous
iterations.
Next, we went to the library and I showed Katie a book by Gene Wolfe that I thought she'd
like and she checked it out. I'm excited to see if it clicks with her. Finally, we
wandered down to the farmer's market. We found a small, upstairs used book store. The kind
that's super, super tiny with books crammed into piles and shelves all over. The kind of
place a protagonist in a young adult novel wanders into and finds a magical book that
changes their destiny. I did not find such a book, but I did find an old Conan the
Barbarian paper back with really cool illustrations so I got that. Then we walked
the street fair with a fresh fruit drink before finally heading over the our friends'
house.
There we pigged out on Vietnamese food and oh yeah! My friend Anthony and I released
our first video game for sale!! We've been working on it with one other person off and
on over the last five years and finally being able to push the launch button was an
amazing feeling. Woke up this mornign to a few sales too! For those reading this not in
the know, you can check it out here:
www.verticalcollapse.com
After that, Paisley and I played Switch tennis where she promptly kicked my butt five
matches in a row. Yeah, I need to get good. Then I kicked her butt at Mario kart sooo...
take that. :P
We got home, cracked a beer and Katie went to bed while I stayed up late on the retro
computer I've been tinkering with playing Diable II.
So yeah... Good day. :)
Cheers!
-milo
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14 august 2026
Another day off after another weekend excursion.
This last weekend, we went to an arcade game convention called California Extreme. It was Katie and myself
and we were joined by our good friend Eddie for Saturday night. Katie and I stayed the night in a hotel
so we got to experience 2 days of the convention. It was a freakin blast, but a bit of sensory overload too.
So many games!! We brought 2 of our own cocktail cabinets to put on the floor. I love being a part of the
experience, but boy is it stressful. Four whole days of go-go-go! We left Saturday from the shop and came back
Sunday to the shop making the whole experience feel like one long day. Not to mention Eddie and I spent
Friday night hauling the games in and Monday night hauling them out. Fun as heck, but I woke up Tuesday
(the day off) just plain exhausted.
We had tentative plans that evening with friends and I just didn't have the physicaly, emotiaonl or mental
battery to do it. I felt so bad, but I felt like half a person that day and just wanted to physically
exist and mentally clock out. We ran some errands, picked up dinner and some beers and spent the day chilling.
We played more Big Walk and drank our beers, smoked some pot and all was well. I did feel a tinge of guilt
not wanting to hang out with our friends, but also not really because I really needed that personal day. It was
a busy week and I had a busy week ahead of me as well.
Most of the events of the year are all passed now, which is a bittersweet feeling. Bitter because I spend all
year looking forward to them and sweet because with no events I can focus on the day to day and make sure
I'm caught up with everything I need to be doing. Now we have the 3 best months of the year to look forward to!
We want to plan a Halloween party and really do up the decorations this year and we are tentatively planning
a stay in Solvang sometime in December. Can't wait!
Till next time. :)
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8 august 2026
Hello blog,
I meant to write this entry a few days ago, but life keeps one busy and all that.
I wanted to start blogs on my day off. I cherish and covet my day off and I really
like to appreciate the good ones. The day off before last I guess I was feeling sort
of grumpy all day even though it was a good day with Katie, so I didn't want to
write about it too much.
This last day off I got back from a river / camping trip that I was looking forward
to for a long time. The trip itself was incredibly refreshing, spiritually and emotionally.
It's always fun to hike the river down to jumping rock and just exist as a human in the water.
I took a little psychedelics and the shapes and colors being made on the little ripples
and waves in the river really put me in a nice place.
We left the campsite on my day off and headed back to town, stopping at Carls Jr for
breakfast on the way, which was nice. We got back to my place and after I finished
unloading all the camping supplies I took a nice loooooooong shower (no showers or
toilets at the campsite) and then took a looooooooong nap in a real bed. When I woke up
it was a beautiful day and I walked outside and felt like I was in a dream. Spending
2 whole days outside of the world displaces you. We kept time by the sun and woke up
and did stuff when we wanted to (I had to put shoes and socks on for the first time the
next day and felt strangely odd about it).
I spent the rest of the day hanging out with Katie. We went to the market close by
to get a few provisions (coffee and ice cream mostly) and spent the day playing
video games. We bought the Big Walk since it came out that day and got really
sucked into it.
All in all, it was a great day off. :)
-milo
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28 july 2026
Hmmmmm.... Hello blog.
I've been feeling extra nostalgic about everything lately. All the time kinda.
Is this just getting old? I really enjoy logging into my Google photos account
and seeing what I was doing on this day last year, two years ago, five years
ago, ten years ago. Amazing that I have a photo record of my life online going
back ten years and more.
Even more amazing are the chat logs that I've been obsessed with. I've already
almost lost Elftown (need to archive as much as I can next time it comes
online) and I need to archive the gmail chats before they get nuked.
We've been running the shop for nearly 3 and a half years now and that's just
crazy. It's changed so much and I enjoy going through the Google photos and
looking at all the different stages or even digging through old invoices for
whatever reason and just seeing the changes and how much we've grown. Never
thought I'd be here but here I am.
Anyway, this is cool. Maybe I'll do this again.
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